When I failed to get pg last cycle the whole idea of skipping this cycle bc of a possible cmas day baby did not sit well with me. First of all, who really cares when the heck your baby is born as long as you have a healthy pregnancy that results in the birth of a full term baby? Secondly, it was starting to wear on me that we were approaching 10m of TTC. Yes I got pregnant back in July, however I m/c'd, so in my head I should either a) be 8.5m pregnant or already pregnant again.
So after peeing on 3 more sticks and my period showing up to confirm that I was indeed not pregnant, I had a chat with Owen. I told him I did not care if the baby was born on cmas eve/day or my bday, all I cared about was that I could get pg again and carry the babe to full term. I also felt that since I ovulated 'on time' that failed cycle, that my body was back to normal and also felt that this was my 'month'. It actually did not take any convincing, he was agreeable to it. He's seen how stressed and upset I've been over the past few months over the entire situation, not being pg, not 'easily' getting pg again and hearing about other ppl being pg (his sister and aunt are both pg with twins) and other babies being born. Plus my due date is just a mere 6 days away, another depressing thing.
Anyway, we decided to go for it and needless to say, when I peed on the stick on Saturday and saw this faint line appear, I blinked 3 or 4xs before I ran into the bedroom, jumped on the bed and stuck the test under Owen's nose. He stared at it for a minute and was like "I don't know why you are grinning like that, I don't see anything". After pointing to the 2nd line which was getting a teeny bit darker, he finally saw it and smiled.
With the joy comes a bit of worry, anxiety and sadness. My wee jellybean is a mere 3w4d old and I can speak for both Owen and I when I say we are worried. I'm super happy and if this babe shows up on time (dec. 16th) or Christmas Eve or Day, I don't care, I just want him to stay in there safe and healthy and not want to come out too soon. Right now I'm trying not to think about it.
I need to call Igras and book an apt to see her. She wants me in for an u/s ASAP (hoping we can book it for 7w ish so they do not need to use the vaginal wand!) and then see her afterwards. I have no idea when the surgery will be booked for, my reading says around the 13w mark, so I'm guessing in June sometime?
For now, we are staying hush hush about it and keeping it a secret between us. I have no paranoia about NOT being pregnant, as of yesterday the fatigue hit me like a bag of bricks had been tied to my feet! I remember this vividly when I was pg with Natasha, the afternoon naps, going to bed by 8pm, but I do not remember it during the first trimester with my 2nd pregnancy. I was a bit tired but not like this. I'm wondering if I need to start taking my Iron Supplement again? Perhaps I'm not eating as well as I was last summer?
No comments:
Post a Comment